"How many Aggies does it take to call a UU minister?"

A note of explanation (for any non-Texans who may be reading): "Aggies" are the nicknames for the sports teams at Texas A&M University, and a common term for all students current and former. There's a widespread stereotype among Texans that Aggies are ignorant, clueless, or just plain stupid, and there is a strong tradition of joking about their supposed antics. The current "meetinghouse" of the UU Church of the Brazos Valley, to which I've been called, is just half a block off the campus of Texas A&M.

Like most Texans, I grew up hearing Aggie jokes, and often telling them when I was young. Telling Aggie jokes seemed OK to people around me, at a time when similar jokes aimed at various ethnic minority groups (thankfully) were losing their acceptability. I always heard that even Aggies themselves liked these jokes, as long as they weren't too mean-spirited. (If that's not true, then please accept my apologies for this post.)

I got a note a couple days ago from a member of First UU Church in San Antonio, where I currently serve as interim minister. After mentioning my call to UUCBV, he asked me the question in the title of this post. Sounded like a great Aggie joke to me! Unfortunately, he didn't follow it up with a punch line. I wondered: what would be a good punch line for a joke like this? Then I realized I should ask the people who know Aggies best: you!

I'm asking for your suggestions, Brazos Valley UUs! In fact, let's make it a contest, with a prize. Post your punch line--ANONYMOUSLY--below in the comments. (After all, I'm not trying to play favorites here, just to write a good joke.) Please keep it rated PG-13, and not too insulting (either to Aggies or to UUs).

The winning entry will be chosen by me and any yet-to-be-determined fellow judges (based on criteria which will be randomly selected, totally subjective, and probably arbitrary). I'll announce the winner next week. [UPDATE: I'm extending this until Tuesday the 22nd, as I'm getting somemore recent entries.] Once I announce the winning punch line--but not before--then please reveal your identity as the author. If more than one person claims authorship, the winner will be determined by some appropriate method of arbitration (like thumb wrestling).* The winner will receive...well, the small bit of satisfaction that might come from knowing yours will be the punch line I'm using whenever I work up the guts to tell the joke. (I didn't say it would be a good prize....) :)

*Please note that thumb wrestling is NOT how I generally recommend resolving conflicts in church.

(Obviously, I'm in a silly mood, and I'm hoping this comes across as good-natured as I intend it to be. I am legitimately curious, though: how do most Aggies, and Bryan-College Staion folk more generally, respond to Aggie jokes?)

Thanks for participating!

Called

It truly was a great joy to return to church today, following the congregational meeting, to find pretty much the entire congregation standing on the chancel stage and cheering as Suzi and I entered the sanctuary. I hope for a wonderful relationship between us, one that helps us all enrich our spiritual lives together. My profound thanks to the Ministerial Search Committee, especially co-chairs Tim Peterson and Linda Stearns, for all their hard work throughout this search process, and for their assistance in easing this developing relationship between minister and church into existence. Until I join you in ministry in about 4 months, may your lives be blessed.

In faith,
Eric

Off to a Good Start

I've been in Bryan-College Station now for three days. It's been a very full stretch of time--I confess it feels almost more like three weeks!--but all of it has been wonderful. So far I've met with some of our awesome young people, their parents, and other people involved in RE; the newly-official Young Adult group (whose Sunday service here a few weeks ago I was very glad to hear about), the youth group (who also have a fabulous Sunday service in the works), and the book club (who were kind enough, after our lunch together, to give me some late-night snack food for the hotel), as well as the many fine people who attended the wine and cheese social last night. Helping to lead worship with you on Sunday was a wonderful experience, and I'll apologize in advance to the people I met on Sunday who's names may not remember next time I see you. And Suzi told me wonderful things about the Heartsease concert she attended while I was finishing up my sermon Saturday night.

My thanks to Tim and Claudette for opening their lovely home to us, and to the members of the search committee who have provided rides and other support for us. Suzi is briefly back in Fort Worth, where she lives--she had to work tonight, tomorrow, and part of Wednesday, but she'll be back by Wed. evening, and staying for the rest of candidating week. I'm looking forward to several more meetings with many committees and groups--rest assured, I'm taking lots of naps in between to rest. Remember that if we've not yet had a chance to meet, and/or you have a question, concern, or curiousity to ask about, there will be an open dialogue/Q&A session at the church, this Thursday from 5:30-7:00 PM. Hope to see you there, and at church on Sunday!

On the Road

Today is the day. Suzi and I are finishing up our packing now. As soon as I post this message, I'll pack up this laptop, load up the car, and leave San Antonio to head to College Station. I'm still very much looking forward to an informative, enriching, and fruitful week together. Hope to see you in church this Sunday!